Hitting all the low probability percentage or when becoming a parent means losing control over everything (PART 1)

My boyfriend is a methodical man who works in finance, a field known for its accuracy and probabilities. As for myself? I am a tornado of emotions. I tell myself that in life, everything happens for a reason. The lines of thought between my spouse and myself, so far apart theoretically, have met over the past year… And not just a bit.

We bought a beautiful house in June 2018. Our first one together! It was our safe heaven, full of dreams and ready to welcome our future children. July comes, and I get sick as a dog. We don’t know what is happening to me. I even get admitted to the hospital after consulting with a clinic. The diagnosis? I have labyrinthitis, as a result, I have to stop working for a month and therefore we have to pause our baby plans.

Photo credit: Jessika Robitaille

OUR FIRST SURPRISE

August promises to be a beautiful month full of good news! Being late on my period, I take a pregnancy test… which happens to be negative. I’m disappointed, but I have trust in fate! It will only be a matter of time before my time comes.

September is already at our doorstep and my oldest child is going to kindergarten! What a big change! But it doesn’t beat my pregnancy test result in mid-September.

It’s positive! I am more than three weeks pregnant, according to the Clearblue test (not to mention it). Our dating ultrasound is due to happen at the beginning of October which is when we got hit with our first surprise.

Photo credit: Jessika Robitaille

At the time, I thought I was 8 weeks pregnant… But then the radiologist asks me if I was sure that my latest period was in early August, and not early June. Why is he asking me that? Of course, I gave him a very positive answer before demanding explanations.

He then replies with a laugh: “It’s because you’re not 8 weeks pregnant, but rather 17 weeks pregnant! You should buy a lottery ticket! That never happens!”

Yep! A false negative pregnancy test! Even if they usually have a reliability of 97% (1), we’ve overlooked the statistics! Remember my labyrinthitis  ̶  which obviously wasn’t one? Early pregnancy has the same symptoms and no doctor had ever thought of that! The most surprising thing is that I still had my period  ̶ which only happens to 15% – 25% of women during their pregnancy (2) and that I eventually got pregnant within the first month after trying to have a baby, which happens to less than 25% of women (3).

But surprises keep falling from the sky

INJURY, PAIN… AND A BREECH BABY

We’re feeling as if we’ve won the life lottery and we’re very happy! But we eventually hit a slippery slope and it got less fun.

As the months passed by, I felt worse. I was in pain everywhere and I couldn’t bear it anymore!

My office Christmas party is the last straw that broke the camel’s back. After staying up all evening, I couldn’t walk the next day… After a medical consultation, I have to stop working until the end of my pregnancy. At that point, I was at my 26th week of pregnancy. Another statistic: I was part of the 22% of women who are on sick leave for more than a quarter of their pregnancy. I had ligament pain at all time. I also learned that my pubic symphysis is too wide  ̶  which happens to less than 24% of women. I have to rest at home and do some physiotherapy until the end of the pregnancy. At that point, I’m starting to find these probabilities less funny.

My 32-week ultrasound comes at last. New surprise! Baby girl is placed in the seat position. At 37 weeks, they tried the external cephalic version which unfortunately didn’t work. So, my Caesarean section is planned for March 5th. My baby is going to be one of the few breech babies who are born by Caesarean in Quebec, which is just 10% to 15% of all Caesarean births.

March 5th is finally here and… We can’t wait to meet our daughter!

The Caesarean went well! It went so well that we returned home after only 2 days at the hospital  ̶  which, as you can imagine, happens very rarely, as the average is 72 hours after a Caesarean delivery. We leave the hospital on a Thursday, and the nurse calls us on Friday. Everything is fine, according to us, so our home visit with a nurse is pushed to the following Monday.

Little did we know what was waiting for us. A serious mistake that would put our daughter in danger…

And you? Do you have stories like that which puts you in the low probability percentage?

Here is the next part of the story, where I will tell you about the beginning of my little one’s life, which was more than challenging.

This post was translated from French to English by:

Aimy

My name is Aimy and I am a second year-student in translation studies. I discover my truths through my passion for literature, arts and culture. I have a keen eye for beauty, a lust for life. For me, every day is a chance to acquire knowledge and create. As Einstein once said, “creativity is intelligence having fun.”

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